From Horse Girl to Horsewoman

Kiki Teague
May 9
3 min read

As a girl, I believed in magic. I believed in wardrobes that could lead to fantastical lands, princesses from other worlds with unicorns disguised as horses, and intelligent animals who could communicate with me telepathically. I thought if I spun fast enough in my family’s office chair I might be able to transport myself to a mythical land. I would cross small, self-made bridges over mud and enter Tarabithia. I would mix dirt and water and grass and leaves into potions and I could control the weather with my mind.

I was most aware of magic when I was around horses. Their fragrance of dirt and sun and hair combined with dew-covered grass and a cool breeze could instantly transport me. I would cut hair from my horses tail and braid it into a bracelet, wearing it day and night so we were always connected. I would whisper her secret name that only I knew.

As I grew from girl to teen, I started spending more time with my friends and less time at the barn. By sixteen, it was time to exchange my horse for a car. Legacy, my off the track thoroughbred, got a new little girl and I got a Chrysler Sebring coupe. From there, it was boyfriends, college, jobs, marriage, and before you knew it, 14 years had passed with maybe 15 rides total.

It wasn’t until I was one year postpartum, exhausted and isolated and bored, that I became a horse girl again. I had just turned 31. The craving came over me like a cresting wave, flattening me in its intensity. Within two months, I’d brought Cowboy up from Texas to live with me in New Jersey. I haven’t gone a week without caking my hands in horse dirt since then.

It wasn’t the ideal time. I didn’t have my own income, I was a full-time stay-at-home mom, I was sleep deprived and burned out with barely a minute of spare time. And horses were exactly what I needed. Day by day, I felt myself come back. My body, my mind, my energy, my spirit, crawling from the depths of motherhood and blossoming into a more complete version of Rachael.

Even if you didn’t grow up to be a horsewoman, chances are you were a horse girl. And that horse girl never leaves you. You are never too old, or too inexperienced, to start working with horses.

Age and experience will place limits on what you can do safely, but they don’t need to stop you from setting aside the burdens of adulthood and embracing the horse girl within.

The biggest recommendation we have for adult amateurs is this: learn.

Tips for Adult Amateurs Rekindling Their Horse Girl Spirit:

Start small, but start – Whether it’s booking a single lesson or simply visiting a barn to watch, every step counts. You don’t need to leap; you just need to begin.
Become a student again – Dive into books, videos, clinics, and conversations. The more you learn, the more confident and safe you’ll feel in the saddle and on the ground.
Find the right barn – Look for a supportive environment with trustworthy trainers and horses that suit your level. You deserve a space where you feel safe, welcomed, and encouraged.
Honor your timeline – You don’t have to ride like you’re 16 again. You’re allowed to go slower, be more thoughtful, and prioritize joy and safety over progress.
Let it be yours – This journey doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s. Whether you ride once a week or every day, lease or own, compete or don’t—it’s still valid, and it’s still magical.